Unlike what alcoholics believe, their condition has a great effect on other people, specifically their children. Children who grow up with alcoholic parents can face many problems growing up, mostly socially and emotionally; so it’s important to make people aware of the consequences for both the parents and the children affected by it.
Psychological and emotional effects
Unfortunately the effects of alcoholism on children is greater than thought. People who are raised by alcoholics tend to have hard time connecting with people and create relationships. The most common side effects are as below
Unable to process normalcy
Because of their condition, these people have not experienced traditional family relationships which has led them to be clueless when it comes to being “normal”. Children with alcoholic parents have different examples for good and bad role models because their parents did not use the traditional way of parenting towards them. As a result, these children often grow up confused and self-conscious because they realize that they were not raised “normally”.
Growing up with lies and broken promises creates a barrier between these children as adults and their relationships with others and their lovers. They often grow up having a hard time trusting people and having commitment issues in order to avoid being lied to. They also avoid conflict because they are afraid of anger of others because of the fear their alcoholic parents created in them.
Because of their different relationship with their parents, these children may often grow up feeling self conscious and with low self esteem. They constantly try to prove themselves worthy because they feel they are not enough.
Seeking approval of others
These children as adults often become people pleasers because they are afraid of negative criticism. As children, they may have been so afraid of their alcoholic parents that they became overachievers and super responsible in order to avoid their anger. They often grow up to be dependent on other with the fear of abandonment that is why they try to make everyone happy. Sometimes this situation can be reversed and these children can grow up to be exactly like their parents.
It is important to know who your alcoholic problem affects your children so as an alcoholic or the child of an alcoholic, you should ask for help because you are supported.